In Memory of Eileen

Six years ago today, my best friend died.

Eileen was just a kitten when she first came to me.  My ex-partner brought her home.  She had stopped at a roadside stand to buy some tomatoes and they were giving away kittens.  There was only one kitten left.  No one wanted her because she had an injury to one foot.  It was badly infected and the people that were giving the kittens away had not bothered to take her to the vet.  My partner felt sorry for the little kitty and said she’d take her.

She drove straight to the vet where Eileen was given antibiotics and then brought her home.  We already had a couple of cats and I didn’t think we needed any more.  She assured me this was only temporary.  We would take care of Eileen until her foot healed, then find her a home.

Well, it took a long time for that foot to heal.  The infection was very severe.  We weren’t even sure she was going to live, but she did.  By the time she had recovered, though, I was in love with her.  There was no way I was finding her a new home.

When my partner and I broke up, I moved to an apartment in the city with Eileen and Cayenne.  I loved both of them, but Eileen was my best friend.  You know how people say that their pets are like their children?  Well, Eileen was not like my child.  She was my best friend.  I might even say she was my soul mate.

Eileen loved me unconditionally.  My current partner, Mike, loves me a lot.  I know he does.  I would even say he loves me unconditionally most of the time.  But with people, there are always conditions at some point, aren’t there?  With Eileen, there never was.

Here is an example of what I mean.  These days, if I have a day when the depression is really bad and I can’t get out of bed, Mike tells me it’s OK, that whatever I can do is enough.  It feels to me like he forgives me for not being able to get work done.  With Eileen, if I had a day when I couldn’t get out of bed, she was perfectly happy to just curl up in bed beside me and purr and purr all day.  It didn’t feel like she was forgiving me for not being able to go to work.  She was happy to have me in bed with her all day.

Six years ago today, Eileen left this world.  Mike and I were having a yard sale at his parents’ house.  We left our house early in the morning.  Eileen was outside and I tried to get her to come back in before we left because I was sure she would not want to stay out all day.  But she didn’t want to come in and I was in a hurry to get to Mike’s parents’ house to set up for the yard sale, so I just left her out.  When we got home many hours later, I expected Eileen to be waiting by the door, eager to go in.  But she wasn’t.

My next door neighbor told me what happened.  When he was leaving for work just a couple of hours after Mike and I left, he discovered Eileen’s body lying in the road.  She’d been hit by a car.  I think she died instantly.  I sure hope so. My neighbor moved her body off the road so that no other cars would hit her and so that I would not see her there in the road when I came home.  I’m still touched by that kindness.

I cannot describe how heartbroken I was to lose Eileen.  I still cry for her sometimes.

Six years ago today, my best friend died.